natalie grace

natalie: "birthday," "born on christmas"
grace: "favor," "blessing"

january 10, 2014, 5:34pm

you have no idea how precious you are
my first thought as i walked into the room, confronted by you,
all 6 pounds and 15 ounces of you, screaming,
under that bright pink, knitted hat.
you were so alert, eyes searching, more curious than fearful
while your pretty mama sat on the bed
looking as natural as any other day
and your daddy beaming,
so delighted to be the father of a daughter now as well.

and i wonder along with everyone else who you will become.

I pray, Natalie Grace,
that you will respond in humble obedience to the call of Jesus,
that as He teaches you of His grace for you
and all that He gave up when He came on Christmas,
that you will receive the wisdom and revelation to know Him best
and to understand that
no success
no performance
no education
no career
no fortune
no reputation that you can gain for yourself
will count for anything in the Kingdom of Grace,
but the work of Jesus on the cross,
His submission, obedience, humility
and the promises of the Father alone
will assure your place with Him and those who know Him when He returns things to how He intended them to be.
I pray that He would teach your little heart to know the hope to which He has called you,
abundant life in Jesus, genuine life found no where else
though people will try and try and try.
I pray that He grows you to be a strong woman (I see it in you already),
rooted, established in His love,
unshakable in spirit,
because your hope lies not here,
that your knowledge of His crazy love for you
would be that which drives you,
His wide, long, high, deep love,
this love that surpasses knowledge,
that you may be a child, a young lady, a woman who is filled with the unmistakable joy and peace of Christ,
that you'll have a ministry to the women that you come in contact with, flowing over with richest Truth to bring hope in any circumstance.
Baby, I pray that you will indeed be gracious,
to your mommy and daddy, to your big brother,
to the rest of your family, your friends, your future husband,
to the Church.
I pray that you know God and that you will love people,
through His incomparably great power.
I love you. We love you.

Now to Him who is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to His power that is at work within is, to Him be the glory in the Church and in Christ Jesus throughout all generations, forever and ever! Amen.

sprout

i've thought about checking it out
you said
my friend goes there every sunday and she goes home crying sometimes
i definitely don't want to cry
but i'm curious what's so great about it
if you only knew that i've prayed for this curiosity for you for 10 years
life and joy - abundantly - that's what's so great about it
only the very things you've been wanting for as long as you can remember
so i continue praying
as one who can only plant seed and water
begging that the One who makes it grow will do His work
and that you'll finally know joy
not just happiness
joy
unshakable
not affected by circumstances or moods or the weather
but that foundational certainty that things are as they should be
for now
until final reconciliation
because
He who designed and sustains everything
is only ever good
and you, i've seen as you've worked hard to be good and kind and selfless
in your own strength
but now you're coming to the end of yours
and your limited grace is running out
and it just might be now
that He deems the appropriate time to remove the scales from your eyes
so you can see and taste that goodness is tactile
and those little ones can follow in your footsteps as you follow in His
just maybe now
i hope

exodus

the exodus.
God made a way where there was no way he said,
plenty of you have similar stories. stand up where you are and tell us
and one. by. one.
marriages restored from the ashes
faith infused into dry bones
adoption/reunion/a biological father who now loves Jesus...and slow healing because the adopted dad reached out to the biological father and the daughter now watches with a heart a little more open than it has even been before
you should all have a story of how God made a way when there was no way he spoke again
and if you don't, you haven't yet received the Gospel.
you don't have to have a story like these
yours is yours and it is unique
mine is mine, also unique
and it has to do with God's biggness and my smallness
He made a way for me to see,
He gently, but necessarily painfully, peeled away the scales, the ones that had been growing there since my conception and the ones that i had stitched into place myself and the ones that i had allowed to be glued into place by the well-meaning friends and the deceiver himself
to get out of my head this idea that God owes it to me to give to me what i want when i want it.
when i get mad at Him for allowing the pain,
for asking me to wait,
for letting my questions go unanswered
and when i used to feel this way about Him,
that He's unfair,
that He is unconcerned with what is best for me,
that He doesn't really know my desires even though He supposedly placed them there...
that He isn't good, loving, wise
when really
graciously, He allowed me an accurate perspective of meta-reality
that i, the created, have no authority over Him, the Creator
that i am so many transcendent steps short of Him that for me to be convinced that i know what He's doing, what He's forgotten to do, what He's done incorrectly
i get this picture of an ant, working tirelessly to trek his way to the oval office,
or to take over the mic at a passion conference
or be the authority responsible to declare war on north korea
he'd have no right.
he'd have no credibility, and absolutely no respect
he's ridiculously limited in what he could ever do or understand
and his agenda would always be only self-seeking, always failing, just stupid
and there you have it
it took a miracle
to part the sea of my selfishness, my short-sighted tunnel vision
to see that beyond the kingdom of me is a kingdom far bigger than the point of a pin
bearing the significance and glory of a realistic kingdom, one that covers the expanse of sky and space and land and sea and all the space yet undiscovered by man and science
and covering also everything beyond physical matter.
a way where there was no way
my eyes opened
my destiny rewritten.
a way made
and all of my humble gratitude.

loss

can i talk to you for a minute? you said
of course, i respond, anxious,
excited to hear the news, the recommendation, the encouragement,
the invitation for dinner, the request for childcare
because every conversation with you, your family, has always poured life into my spirit,
i've always felt love, unquestioned safety, respect
sitting at your feet,
soaking up even the smallest bits of wisdom and grace that i can take in,
watching a marriage established on the unshakable rock of Christ
watching a family dynamic that bleeds worship
and a home that illuminates the order (yes, really) and honor for which you were drawn from the chaos of unbelief.
i experienced from you an irreplaceable gift [1 corinthians 4.15-16].
we're moving, you said
oh!.. to where..? i asked
400 miles, you answered
and i cried.
and i'm quite certain that neither of us expected that from me.
you, definitely, unaware of the blessing that you and your family have been to me
and i, evidently, didn't know either
until the tears came
and kept coming for the next days.
but i recognize that it has to be more than this opportunity that you, your family, have been given
its a larger sense that my world is being shaken
two pillars of theological bedrock being removed from our community in the same week
and you, incredibly talented communicator,
a rare, profound perspective of the Church, the family, the Gospel, eternity
gifted for a season to this church family.
my security again questioned,
and i have to determine where my ultimate security is planted,
where my hope is truly found,
where my joy in anchored.
yes, though, you+she offered to me one of the safest places of theological sanctuary,
because very few people have my respect and trust the way that you+she have earned
but,
but
i have the Spirit of Him who created and sustains all things by the words of His mouth
i have, by His divine power, all that i need for life and godliness
i have the unshakable foundation of truth in Christ. alone.
i have an unspeakable joy set before me
and
i have your love and influence still promised to me
even from 400 miles away.
you, far too gifted to be unused for the Kingdom,
far too needed,wanted,respected in that community to say no,
you+she with far too much to offer in terms of discipleship,
your intimate knowledge of our Savior, to stay here,
she, with so much to say to the young women in her influence about
marriage, motherhood, commitment to our precious Jesus and His Word,
you have to go. i know. i understand. i agree. and i bless you as you plan, go, and begin all that God will do through you there.
soli deo gloria. 

but whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. what is more, i consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake i have lost all things. i consider them garbage, that i may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith. i want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead. not that i have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but i press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. brothers and sisters, i do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. but one thing i do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, i press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus...only let us live up to what we have already attained.
[philippians 3] 

risk

when you let a friend into the stirrings of your mind
those ones that i see whirling behind your eyes
but they just never quite make it out of those tightly sealed lips
like a prison,
the key held by yourself
that fear needn't be so controlling a taskmaster
when you have One greater living within you
because intimacy comes after risk
true freedom comes as a result of true surrender
and when you place your full trust in He who can never fail you
never abandon you
never turn His back on you
never hurt you futilely
never overlook you
never hold out on you
you're free
to open
and let go
to be known
but that risk knows that mere men
can and will hurt you
betray your trust
be unable to read your mind
occasionally feed your fears
break your heart
but
if you can trust
He who is faithful
you can trust Him working, always, in those tender hearts and minds
of those who just may hurt you some day
but
let me encourage you
that the risk
is well worth the pain
because the pain is temporary
the growth, grace, trust, holiness
is of colossal value
so take a risk, friend,
knowing that you cannot fall from grace
and your identity and eternity are sealed in Him who has called you by name.

dear mr. president

dear Mr. President,
with all possible respect,
because i fully believe that you've been set in place by God and that your obligation is to Him first,
us second,
please understand the job that is yours.
leading, not dividing, the American people.
this health care bill has become your idol, your pearl of great price for which, it appears, you will sell anything. democracy even?
so i appeal to you on behalf of the adults in this country who are watching this juvenile argument over issues that need not carry this weight.
we live in a democracy. you are responsible to lead a democracy.
what we see, however, is your whole-hearted pursuit of a dictatorship under which all national decisions fall on you, and to whichever advisors you prefer to listen.
please do not make this a democrat vs. republican fight. please forego the blaming.
this is a democratic, a representative, issue. and the reality is that men and women in Congress, with complete freedom of speech and vote, have chosen on behalf of the Americans whom they represent that funding this health care bill is not in the best interest of the whole, though it indeed appears to be in your best interest, the best interest of your pride...perhaps.
because, as far as i've been informed to date, America is a democracy rather than a dictatorship, you, mr. president, have the responsibility to do what is best for the people based on what the people desire and what their representatives choose.
i imagine that, in your marriage, you do not steamroll your wife when she wants something that is different from what you want. i imagine that you have to stand down at times and adjust your desires and form some sort of compromise - because of your love for your wife - for the ultimate good of the marriage.
please show the American people that they are priority, that unity is paramount. please show them your character, your leadership. please show the world why America is respectable and stable and most of all, united.
please humble yourself, sir, and be willing to let your pride suffer a loss, so that one step back can lead to many more steps forward.
i plead with you, see the panoramic whole. think beyond 2013. this tunnel vision is less that beneficial for the long term and for we, the people of the United States.

respectfully,
tammy dykstra
grand rapids, michigan.

abundance

to my 5.
if i could communicate anything to you over our next 3 years together it is this picture of God,
He who modeled for you how to pursue joy and righteousness,
He who is not primarily concerned with your happiness and comfort - though, yes, He says that these are good things! - but these are not the qualities that will develop your character and these will not equip you with the strength to walk victoriously through life's trials.
He is concerned with your deep and lasting growth, your holiness and humility, that you might know Him as richly as possible.
this world teaches (and will only do more so) that God's love means
that He is willing to accept unrepentant sin,
that He encourages men and women to satisfy every desire that stirs within them,
and that ultimately He will overlook every sin, every rejection of Him and allow all men access to joy in His presence for eternity.
know, dear ones, that God has spoken clearly (though not necessarily simply) in the Bible
that He cannot and will not tolerate any sin that is not both covered by the costly blood of Jesus and removed from daily life,
that joy is found when walking according to His desires alone,
and that the way to the Father is by faith alone, through grace alone, through Jesus alone, and that this relationship is made evident only by the fruit of a pure and transformed life.
be willing to sacrifice anything that does not make His name greater,
be willing to suffer the loss of any desire that doesn't purify you to become more like Jesus,
be willing to deny yourself any pleasure that only increases your appetite for the empty way of life that this world so liberally extends to you.
deny yourself, take up your cross, for the joy set before you.

refuse to settle for the muddy poisoning water when the pure, life-giving water is freely given to you. and with it abundant joy.

 

^"15 See, I set before you today life and prosperity, death and destruction. ¹⁶ For I command you today to love the Lord your God, to walk in obedience to him, and to keep his commands, decrees and laws; then you will live and increase, and the Lord your God will bless you in the land you are entering to possess.
¹⁹ This day I call the heavens and the earth as witnesses against you that I have set before you life and death, blessings and curses. Now choose life, so that you and your children may live ²⁰ and that you may love the Lord your God, listen to his voice, and hold fast to him. For the Lord is your life,.."  [Deuteronomy 30]

snatched.

zechariah 3.
then He showed me joshua, the high priest standing before the angel of the Lord, and satan standing at his right side to accuse him.
the Lord said to satan, "the Lord rebuke you, satan! the Lord, who has chosen jerusalem, rebuke you! is not this man a burning stick snatched from the fire?"
now joshua was dressed in filthy clothes as he stood before the angel.
the angel said to those who were standing before him, "take off his filthy clothes." then He said to joshua, "see I have taken away your sin, and I will put fine garments on you."
...
"and I will remove the sin of this land in a single day.
"in that day each of you will invite your neighbor to sit under your vine and fig tree," declares the Lord Almighty.

and why?

filthy,
sin-soaked like a slice of bleached white bread lost in a calf-deep puddle of rich muddy clay,
but our Representative stands on our behalf to declare us clean, righteous, before the Judge who judges each man according to what he has done.

why?

love.
and i guess i just don't accurately comprehend yet what love means.
a gift offered, not for exchange,
free and unnecessary,
only necessary for rescuing the little image-bearing bits from the fire.

so we fix our eyes on Jesus, and we store up for ourselves a treasure that will last.

ps. sometime this week, this link will have available today's sermon [rod vansolkema / zechariah 3 / joshua / sept. 1]. a ridiculously firm foundation of truth on which we stand.

tongue

"A basic condition of successful literacy... is that it should be attained in the mother tongue. Literacy achieved in any language other than the mother tongue is like... to remain superficial and incomparable with the literacy of people who learned to read in the language in which their mothers sang them to sleep." - Margaret Mead 

told

my God who has handed me opportunity after opportunity
He, who has provided for all of my needs one day after another
who has been consistently faithful to me
who has acted out of nothing but goodness.
who am i to complain to Him about the things that i do not [yet] have?
and who am i, for a moment, to neglect to trust Him
the One who is not only sovereign but so very good, simultaneously
a mention of coming discipleship placed in my unsuspecting hands
a home with support and generosity and grace that reflects Jesus
friends who would drop anything to be with me if i asked
a church family that has all of my respect and investment.
joy upon joy: available to those who will acknowledge and obey
i just need to be told sometimes