Thursday, December 27, 2012


is acknowledged dependence on God.

the past week has handed me plenty to be thankful for.

overhearing what my aunts were whispering about me at breakfast yesterday.
micah's squealing joyfulness.
words, books, and writing.
the january series.
the Holy Spirit and His unmistakable presence.
crossroads family.
childlike curiosity. addi.
holiday trivia.
new learning opportunities.
mercies that are new every morning.
the Gospel, preached again and again.
j & k's baby coming in the summer...
friends with hearts to serve around the world
   kenya, bangladesh, india, korea, dominican republic, poland, new zealand
Bible translating projects around the world
dreams of traveling
   the netherlands, germany, india, zambia, south africa, rome, mexico, israel. again.
my family
God's power, perfect in my weakness
the story i'll hear tonight.

is acknowledged dependence on God.
n talks about it in his book
let me put in a plug for it...
you might consider checking it out for yourself...
Keep Going: Overcoming Doubts about Your Faith
did i mention that i recommend it? 
it is a beautiful testimony
which flows out of his own 8-year wrestling match
and it follows a path to the exaltation of God and Scripture,
to a resting place of acceptance of sovereignty, responsibility, divine justice, and assurance.

Monday, December 24, 2012


what hope we hold this starlit night
a king is born in bethlehem
our journey long, we seek the light
that leads to the hallowed manger ground

what fear we felt in the silent age
four-hundred years can He be found
but broken by a baby's cry
rejoice in the hallowed manger ground

Emmanuel, Emmanuel
God incarnate, here to dwell
Emmanuel, Emmanuel
praise His name Emmanuel

the son of God, here born to bleed
a crown of thorns would pierce His brow
and we beheld this offering
exalted now the King of kings
praise God for the hallowed manger ground

thank you, chris tomlin, for a beautiful, theological worship song. listen to it here: emmanuel

read the christmas story in light of those who walked, worked, learned, and waited in those years just before B.C met A.D.
the people of israel had lived a blind 400 years with no obvious influence from the God whom they had followed (though unfaithfully) for as long as they existed as a people, established under abraham.
they rested under God's rule, with His hand regularly evident in the day to day
until the time that followed solomon
when the king and the people had finally rejected God for the last time
until He gave Himself in reconciliation to mankind once and for all in the birth of Jesus.
the people had anxiously hoped for the prophet, priest, king who would be able to finally and completely reconcile them to God
but each mediator that stood on their behalf proved that he/she, like all the others before him/her had not the power to rule over death, thus making the washing of sin out of the question as well
again, until Jesus.
after years of waiting for God to bring to reality the things that He had promised so many years before,
the song describes that a baby's cry broke the hopelessness of silence that man had experienced in their relationship with God
and not only did God show His face again to mankind (the lack of which we will never know…) He allowed His people to feel His presence again in the form of the long-awaited fulfillment to their deepest longing:
a mediator that would stand forever on their behalf. 
we have Him still.
we've been given the greatest gift in our opportunity to know Him.
beautiful grace and precious salvation
a gift from a good Father who cannot help but pour out the abundance of perfect love that He is…
merry christmas, friends!!
i love you. because He loves.

Saturday, December 22, 2012


yes, i unplugged from facebook for a few days
and i'm very excited about it.
i took up a challenge after listening
to a beautiful testimony from a friend
(...thank you for your honesty and humility!)
God has been teaching my heart plenty
and over the next days i hope to put words to as much of it as possible.
see you soon...

Saturday, December 1, 2012


the difference between sins and sin.
i asked Him to show me my sins.
He did
and not much time had to pass
before i understood that He'd take them
from the east to the west
but still
that lingering sin... sinfulness
the disease that is not identifiable by a label or a moment in time
but by a seed that grows itself in the heart
from conception
the concreteness of sins make them graspable
and this makes a need for a savior realistic.
but when those apparent sins are less a part of one's story
this clouds a vision of any emptiness.
He'll show me my sins (plural)
and yes, I can see Jesus' blood cover them.
But when He shows me my sin (singular)
the seed in my soul
that continues to manufacture the sins
i start to wonder what good it is to cover the sins
when the factory that forms and develops and trains them
remains seemingly untouched and functioning just like before?
my mind begins to conceptualize this reality
and my eyes widen, not in childlike wonder,
but in devastatingly hopeless turmoil
and finally
the sense that i have nothing to wipe up this mess
except for these perpetually filthy rags,
sentenced to forever be a plant of sin production-
this eclipses my vision and i see nothing beyond.
and i'm left there
if not for One who so far surpasses me
but One who at the same time
can sympathize with my weaknesses,
the humble Savior who alone
offers clean rags
and a pure heart.
and everything is different now.
not because the sins are atoned for
but because the sin is removed
at its root
and He plants Himself where the seed used to be
for He delights in showing me mercy.
fresh each morning.