loss

can i talk to you for a minute? you said
of course, i respond, anxious,
excited to hear the news, the recommendation, the encouragement,
the invitation for dinner, the request for childcare
because every conversation with you, your family, has always poured life into my spirit,
i've always felt love, unquestioned safety, respect
sitting at your feet,
soaking up even the smallest bits of wisdom and grace that i can take in,
watching a marriage established on the unshakable rock of Christ
watching a family dynamic that bleeds worship
and a home that illuminates the order (yes, really) and honor for which you were drawn from the chaos of unbelief.
i experienced from you an irreplaceable gift [1 corinthians 4.15-16].
we're moving, you said
oh!.. to where..? i asked
400 miles, you answered
and i cried.
and i'm quite certain that neither of us expected that from me.
you, definitely, unaware of the blessing that you and your family have been to me
and i, evidently, didn't know either
until the tears came
and kept coming for the next days.
but i recognize that it has to be more than this opportunity that you, your family, have been given
its a larger sense that my world is being shaken
two pillars of theological bedrock being removed from our community in the same week
and you, incredibly talented communicator,
a rare, profound perspective of the Church, the family, the Gospel, eternity
gifted for a season to this church family.
my security again questioned,
and i have to determine where my ultimate security is planted,
where my hope is truly found,
where my joy in anchored.
yes, though, you+she offered to me one of the safest places of theological sanctuary,
because very few people have my respect and trust the way that you+she have earned
but,
but
i have the Spirit of Him who created and sustains all things by the words of His mouth
i have, by His divine power, all that i need for life and godliness
i have the unshakable foundation of truth in Christ. alone.
i have an unspeakable joy set before me
and
i have your love and influence still promised to me
even from 400 miles away.
you, far too gifted to be unused for the Kingdom,
far too needed,wanted,respected in that community to say no,
you+she with far too much to offer in terms of discipleship,
your intimate knowledge of our Savior, to stay here,
she, with so much to say to the young women in her influence about
marriage, motherhood, commitment to our precious Jesus and His Word,
you have to go. i know. i understand. i agree. and i bless you as you plan, go, and begin all that God will do through you there.
soli deo gloria. 

but whatever were gains to me I now consider loss for the sake of Christ. what is more, i consider everything a loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord, for whose sake i have lost all things. i consider them garbage, that i may gain Christ and be found in him, not having a righteousness of my own that comes from the law, but that which is through faith in Christ—the righteousness that comes from God on the basis of faith. i want to know Christ—yes, to know the power of his resurrection and participation in his sufferings, becoming like him in his death, and so, somehow, attaining to the resurrection from the dead. not that i have already obtained all this, or have already arrived at my goal, but i press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. brothers and sisters, i do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. but one thing i do: forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, i press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus...only let us live up to what we have already attained.
[philippians 3]