Poor

i have this desire
for God to completely change who i am.
the desire of my heart in this moment is to be a person who speaks words of life and truth.
only life and truth.
and to be so poor in spirit that i walk in a constant state of humility.
i appreciate God's faithfulness so much more in these seasons,
even his faithfulness in granting us the things that we ask according to his will.
spiritual inefficiency.
he gives it freely because it is his desire for me.
and it doesn't make me happy to be poor in spirit.
but it feels better than everything else.
this is joy.
and it is in these rare moments that my steps intersect and align with reality.
the purpose of my life, and yours,
is to look like him to a world that doesn't have a clue how much it needs him.
a world that strives and strives for happiness...rather than joy
and for a temporary, easily-accessible satisfaction...
rather than permanence.
i agree that i must become less
and he must become. so. much. more.

he>me